Thursday, August 25, 2011

Confessions of a Crazed Fangirl

There is a time and a place for everything. Including flailing like I'm still 15...

That place is a little website called Tumblr. A place where fans of anything and everything can go to confess their die-hard love and obsession over a TV show, a movie, a book, a pop culture phenomenon, or a random genre that's of little-known interest to others. What is it about our culture and our society that people can get so intense about something so insignificant as a single book or movie? What is it that moves us to obsession?

I often find my own level of enthusiasm for certain things very amusing. I've prided myself on being a level-headed kind of gal, and yet I have to admit to myself and the internet at large that I often have an addictive personality when it comes to certain movies, books, and t.v. shows. On one hand, I was never one for role-playing and I only had a brief desire to write/read fanfiction while in high school. However, it has recently come to my attention, especially on Tumblr, that I can have a very focused, and in that sense a very obsessive, liking of certain pop culture phenomena. My current fandom obsession has branched from the television show, Glee, and now includes anything to do with Darren Criss and his theater company, Starkid Productions. Since I have not been working this summer, or had a whole lot to do at all, I've spent many a-day on Tumblr, reblogging almost every picture and post that is Darren-related. I've come to know every aspect of the man's public persona (and even a little of his private life) and also various aspects of his fandom.

For those who are oblivious of various internet jargon, a fandom is nothing more than the group of fans of a specific actor/actress/tv show/movie/book/etc. Thus, being a fan of almost anything related to Darren Criss, I am a part of the Darren Criss fandom, the Glee fandom (often called gleeks), and the Starkid fandom (also known as Team Starkid or Starkiddies). Granted, this self-identification as a fan and the subsequent banding together (often on the internet) of fans in a fandom can often develop a cult-like following. If you're looking to school yourself on fandom jargon, urbandictionary.com is an excellent place to look (I've had to go there to remind/update myself on certain phrases).

I became a fangirl at an early age. Don't we all? It's human nature to be interested in certain things and not others, to spend time on certain activities and not others. When I was young, I loved reading and became a quick fan of historical fiction, fantasy, and sci-fi. Also, like a lot of girls my age, I was in love with the boyband phenomenon: Hanson, *NSync, and Backstreet Boys posters were plastered on my walls. Starting in late middle school, and especially through high school, I increasingly became much more of a nerd. More than that, I became comfortable and confident in my nerdiness. My fan obession then turned to the Lord of the Rings, first inspired by the films and then increased when I read the books. The films continue to be some of my favorite, and in college I dug deeper into the books, discovering their academic merit and the breadth of the Ringer fandom.

Throughout this time of nerdy self-discovery, I was also a fan of the Harry Potter books, but these took a backseat to my obession over everything Tolkien. I wasn't impressed with the HP movies from the start, and while I pre-ordered books 4-7 of Harry Potter (and went to Border's at midnight a few times), I wasn't very aware of the Potter fandom until after all the books were published and I was nearing the end of my college career. I was introduced to the Vlogbrothers by another college student the summer before my senior year, and from watching their videos and participating in the Project for Awesome that December (click on the links for more details), I discovered some die-hard Potterheads on YouTube, and, through them, the immensity and longevity of the Potter fandom.

This brings us full-circle to today. When I first read in an article last fall that Darren Criss was cast in Glee, I saw that he had gone to the University of Michigan (my school's rival, and not much more than an hour away), and while there, starred in A Very Potter Musical. There were also many nerdfighters (see the Vlogbrothers link) who were talking about it around that time in a Vlogbrothers chat. After I saw Darren in his first episode on Glee (Season 2, Episode 6), I decided that I should find out what this musical was all about, and I watched both AVPM and A Very Potter Sequel over Thanksgiving weekend. I've been a Starkid fan ever since, and when I finally broke down and got a tumblr (mostly because the Vlogbrothers did), I became obsessed almost to the point of lunacy with anything Starkid or Glee related.

So what is it about tv shows like Glee or books like Harry Potter that get people so riled up that they devote every waking second on the internet to it? On one hand, it does have to do with a specific age group. Teenagers (and pre-teens) strive for inclusion, and internet fandoms are one place for that. What's more, during our teenage years we are more prone to identify ourselves and others based on a few specific traits, which often leads to cliques and stereotypes (which can then, in turn, lead to bullying). When a group of teenagers can relate to one another over a specific interest (such as a TV show or movie), they form a group that is both exclusive and inclusive (I belong because I am also like you, they don't belong because they aren't like us).

Fandoms are not limited to teens, however. There are many young adults (20s and even older), such as myself, who consider themselves as part of certain fandoms. Sure, there are less of them forming virtual communities, but I think that points more to the fact that young people today are more accustomed to the internet than older generations, and not that they are more prone to gather around a TV show, movie, or book. Fandoms are taking a new shape online, but they are nothing new (we have all heard of the intensity of Trekkies and Star Wars fans, and Lord of the Rings fans, aka Ringers, have been around a long time before the films were produced).

Yes, the intensity of needing an identity and a community may be more strongly felt by young people, because they are beginning to establish their personal selves. However, I do believe that fandoms are not based solely on teenage urges. They are based on this desire that all humans have: a desire for community and identity. This is the basis for nations and national identity, forming communities around common ideas. The foremost scholar on nationalism and national identity, Benedict Anderson, defines the nation as an "imagined political community... It is imagined because the members of even the smallest nation will never know most of their fellow-members, meet them, or even hear of them, yet in the minds of each lives the image of their communion... it is imagined as a community, because, regardless of the actual inequality and exploitation that may prevail in each, the nation is always conceived as a deep, horizontal comradeship" (The Nationalism Project). In the same way, fandoms, like nations, are imagined communities. This is not to say that these communities are imaginary, they are not, never confuse those two words. As Anderson points out, the nation is very real, especially for those who are members of it. It is imagined because it is socially constructed. In the same way, fandoms are socially constructed. They are formed by people who don't know each other, who many never meet each other, but who identify with each other based on a common interest. Like a nation, a fandom is conceived as comradeship ("Those who are not one of us would not understand"). Thus, a fandom is an imagined cultural (instead of political) community based on a particular cultural artifact (a film, a book, a public persona).

In his book, Imagined Communities (published in 1983), Benedict Anderson also argues that nationalism also spread and took root because of the development of print. In similar ways, the fandom has taken root and spread because of the development of the internet. As Thomas Friedman argues in The World is Flat, the world is becoming increasingly interconnected because of the exponential advances of technology. This has changed how people interact with one another, and in terms of cultural icons, it has been a conduit for the creation of communities based around these cultural icons. In short, fandoms have become bigger, grander, and more wide-spread because of the internet. It is because of the internet that I have been able to find other members of the Darren Criss, Glee, Harry Potter or Starkid fandoms from around the world, from places like Australia, Sweden, and Norway, and also those who went to the same college who I would never have been able to meet in real life. What's more, it is because of the internet that some of these fandoms were started in the first place, and it is because of the internet that they are able to continue to grow in new and exciting ways.

So, my fangirl ways may have just started out as teenage obsession and falling in love with people I'll never meet, but I believe it has grown into much more. Internet fandoms are virtual communities where people of all ages, races, sexual preferences, genders, backgrounds, countries, and languages can bond over common interests. And there is potential for so much more. (Check out the Harry Potter Alliance for just one example of this.)


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